Silence is the new luxury
The top 2 luxuries were a bubble bath, and receiving a handwritten letter. They were the only 2 which I remember and have stuck with me over the years. Why? well quite simply they are the 2 things I have not experienced for a very long time. You see a spa pool doesn't really count. Having a bubble bath involves so much more. The anticipation, the temperature, the actual bubbles or oil that is to be added, the candles, yes or no? dimmed light, yes or no? drink wine? read a book? music? the list of options go on. The most important aspect of taking a bubble bath is the timing of course. You see, I have tried to take a bath over the years, but then there's the 'mum, can I come in with you?' or the 'tap tap, sorry mum to bother but where's the......' but the worst one in of all is when my husband decides to sit on the toilet seat and talk to you while having your bath! At this point I have to say that there are numerous places and times I would just love him to choose to whisk me away to have a talk, I yearn for the time that he would do this, but no, he chooses my bath time. I do have a suspicion that he is hoping to also get glimpses of naked body parts amongst the bubbles. For him it is a 2 for 1 deal. For me it is just doesn't cut the mustard.
So why is silence amongst my list of life's luxuries? Because it is now rare and hardly seen. I am one of those people that need silence to write, to read and to concentrate. I hate interruptions! I don't mind nature, that is not noise to me. I cannot work out why humans need to have headphones with music on all the time. I can't go for a walk with music in my ears, I am too paranoid that something will come up behind me, I think it is too dangerous, you aren't in touch with you surroundings. What I classify and natures surroundings you may well want to block out with music. To actually sit in silence can be unnerving if you are not use to it or practised in it. My husband ALWAYS puts the sports radio station on in his car, loud. I never put the radio or music on. When driving to work or home I just want to have my own thoughts, pray or reflect. It is my down time. When the boys are in the car, I see it as an opportunity to have them locked in for conversation. It works a treat.
I read just this week that architects are now steering away from open plan living and putting walls back up. People are finding it too noisy and there are no 'nooks' for them to hide away to read etc. They are calling it 'broken-plan' living. Let's watch that space! literally!
Have you ever been in to a shop and noticed that there is NO music playing, doesn't it unease you and make you feel vulnerable? I do. I have become so conditioned to hearing music in malls and shops, that when it is not there I actually notice it.
I am not hear to say that I have mastered the silence thing. I have just bought to attention because it may well be one of our Plus 2 Minus 2 goals. To simply spend some time in silence. Oooooo that really does sound uncomfortable! I promise you it will be harder than you think.
There are also times when we should not have silence. To me the dinner time table is a place of talking and sharing. To eat my meal with family in silence would be stupid. It is the one time a day I can get us altogether to talk. I was bought up eating dinner on our laps in front of the TV. No one talked, there was silence. You see silence can have a twist, There are times when it is killing you, like in a relationship with no communication. But there is time when silence is pure gold.
Homework for you is to try and find a time when you want silence. Don't forget to quantify it. Don't try once a week if you know it won't work. Be realistic, make it tangible, make it enjoyable and most of all, make it real for you.
Until next time we meet.
God Bless you.
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